What do you see?I stand unnoticed swaying to the pulse of the windWhat do you see?
Ever blowing ever lasting placid and untainted unlike me
For my thoughts are as dark as night and as morbid and depressing as a morgue
I have felt like this before so infuriated and a self repugnance to my self image
To find myself again I must let the wind sway me once more
So pure and cold to everything and everyone indiscriminately
Like hundreds before me I have felt confused and alone
So stand me outside give me to the purest of winds and……
As I stand unnoticed to the wind so serene a
Twilight of loveThis darkness suffocating and pushing me to the brink of madnessTwilight of love
Recedes once the sun pushes and rises to my rescue
As I expect you to do but never happens you who doesn’t know of my existence
Has my life to keep and rescue from my own hands but
This sad as hell darkness only has to suffocate me as you aren’t here to protect me
And the sun only comes up the better half of the day as we are suns and moons apart
And I’m non existent to you for I’m an insignificant part of your future
As you are a part of my present, but until we meet past those moons and
My reality or yours.....Why do I keep asking what is my reality?My reality or yours.....
Why do I feel that my life so far is nothing but fiction and a dream?
I feel lost, hollow and alone but no one is listening
I want to feel more, but can’t
I want to cry to yell out, but why am I silent?
I don’t know who I am because....
I don’t know if I am, but I want to feel and release this pain
To be real and let go of this pain
To be real for once in this reality that has been created for me
I want to belong be somewhere I’m someone to belong,
But cant until I’m gone an
My Question is...I have yet to understand the meaning of love....My Question is...
Why you ask......because I know the love of family and friends
But what about the other kind, the kind that drives you insane,
Won't let you concentrate that kind of love is what I’m lacking in my life
I am alone yet unafraid to be it for the rest of my life
My only one and true fear is......to die not having experienced the insane love
That many of mankind shares now my question is......
Will you be brave enough to show me what love can me like?
--
Fabiola N.
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